Happy New Year, you beautiful things! I hope your NYEs were fun/mad/cosy/quiet/whatever you wanted them to be. Mine was spent on the sofa for the first time in maybe 15 years and I absolutely loved it, so I guess I’m a) an adult and b) really boring now.
We’ll talk new years resolutions, intentions, goals and all the other words to that effect another day, but since some of my aims for the year include finding balance, enjoying life more, stopping getting worked up about stupid things all the time, and being kinder to myself and others, I thought I would start the year with some things that I need to remember. They sound obvious and contrived now, but when I’m dramatically telling my boyfriend that I’m ‘the fattest person who ever lived’, staying up until 3am because I simply must put a blog post out the next day, crying because I’m tired and I’ve let something tiny ruin my day, or throwing a strop because I don’t have an Instagram photo to post (all real things that have happened guys – no you seem like a real joy to be around) it’s suddenly quite easy to forget them.
I’d like to say before we begin that I’m writing in the second person, but I’m sort of talking to myself. I’m not trying to suggest that you also need to remember these things – you remember whatever you like – although I suspect that there may be a few people who could use the reminder about a couple of them because I’m sure I’m not the only perfectionist, self-care avoider or worrier out there. Without further ado, here are 18 things that I’ll be trying to remember in 2018:
1. Embarrassment is far from the worst thing you can feel, so stop dwelling on times that you ‘felt stupid’ and don’t allow the fear of it to stop you going after what you want.
2. Either snooze properly, or get up properly. If you need the sleep, take it – and enjoy it. Snoozing in 5 minute intervals for 45 minutes then spending the day feeling both exhausted and guilty for doing so brings you literally nothing.
3. The number on the tags in your clothes is just that – a number. None of these numbers are ‘better’ than any of the other numbers, except when it’s got a £ in front of it and you’ve nearly spent all your money for the month.
4. It’s fine to say ‘I’m going to have a night at home this evening’ instead of either saying a fake enthusiastic ‘YAY, see you there!’ or not saying anything at all. Good friends will understand, and you’ll feel better for having been honest.
5. What someone looks like, what they sound like, what they do with their time or body, is no concern of yours. Be kind – not just because you have no idea what’s going on in someone’s life and they could be struggling (although that too), but because there’s no reason to be otherwise. Basically, don’t be a dick.
6. An evening away from the phone with a good book instead will do what 20 new Instagram followers never will. You can’t unread that book, after all…
7. There is no universal ‘perfect’, so stop worrying that you aren’t it or allowing the fear of reaching unattainable standards stop you from trying.
8. It is highly unlikely that you are going to cause the world to end simply by not publishing a blog post on a given day, and it’s actually rather arrogant to think otherwise. If it’s 2am, you’re exhausted, and you’re struggling to form one single English sentence, close the damn laptop.
9. Be present when you’re spending time with friends and family. For one thing, it’s rude not to be and those people deserve for you not to take them for granted, and for another, you’ll enjoy it a lot more.
10. Question things. Why do I feel that way? Why am I letting that affect me? The likelihood is that when you try to explain to yourself why you’re upset or why you’re bothered by something you’ll realise why you shouldn’t be.
11. When in the throes of the morning throw-everything-out-of-the-wardrobe ‘I have nothing to wear!’ session, just stick some red shoes on. You’ll feel sassy all day.
12. Basically nothing will happen if you gain or lose a few pounds, apart from the obvious fact that you will weigh a few pounds more or less. Neither of them is a magical highway to happiness, neither of them is a ‘failure’ and neither of them are the ‘right’ direction for your weight to be going.
13. Holding a grudge over really tiny things will cause you far more annoyance/anger than it will the other person. Probably just let it go about that thing that person at work said to you a month ago…sure, they’ll be on your ‘list’ for life now (seriously), but you don’t need to think about it every other day like you have been.
14. You love baths. Have more baths.
15. If you’re having a bad day, try not to drag someone else’s down with you. Again – don’t be a dick.
16. How ‘good’ your blog is is not measured in numbers of Twitter or Instagram followers or even page views. Make quality and improvement your goals and at least if only two people read your posts, those two people are likely see how much thought and effort has gone into it.
17. It’s not a waste of time if you enjoy it. It is a waste of time if you spend the thing that should be enjoyable worrying about wasting time.
18. When you inevitably get caught up in the madness of life, don’t remember any of these things and find yourself getting worked up about something you told yourself you wouldn’t – that’s okay too. There’s always next time.
What will you be trying to keep in mind this year? Do any of these apply to you too?
Coat – Primark | Top – New Look | Jeans – H&M | Bag – Mango | Boots – Dorothy Perkins
Photography: Rob Poor